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In other words, she throws the bomb and then she runs. And, as she observes, the high divorce rate does not even address those who stay married but remain deeply miserable. Clearly if there were a Starr Report on every American marriage, the institution would instantly crumble, never to recover. Infidelity, lack of passion, mutuality, rebellious midlife crosses, and complete vulnerability seem like easy sacrifices in modern society and relationships; yet on closer inspection, they are challenges for most people in some degree, leading us to chastise the victims. Will We Ever Catch a Break? Kipnis enumerates, with unrepressed glee, most of the politicians in recent history who have espoused family values only to be embarrassed by a naked mistress or two in their own closets.

She sets forth a Chomskian universal “grammar” for unhappy coupledom: Such a method can be wittily illuminating as in Roland Barthes’ essay on the Roman haircut in films , but you can’t keep getting away with airy assertion. Kipnis asks, “is this really what we mean by a Good Relationship? The historian Lawrence Stone points out that divorce now does for ending marriage what death used to do. For the purposes of “Against Love,” she views legalized monogamy as a killjoy institution of the industrialized patriarchy, a dumbing and numbing of the human tropism toward pleasure.

However rare it may be, two people sometimes really find each other magically compatible and love each other passionately and forever. It begs the question: Kipnis takes her argument one step further.

Through her article Kipnis is attempting to get people to think critically about these societal beliefs and question them. Submerged in the marital jelly of lqura and numbness, we’re much more productive and easier to manage.

A more exact title would have been Against Domestic Coupledombut Against Love makes the better bumper sticker.

Assignment 4: Kipnis | austingraves99

Although her dark beliefs are unappealing to most, her rhetoric devices help to recognize that they are not quite wrong.


And forget the fact that sexual desire in human beings is disorderly and unpredictable: In her essay Kipnis notes that people are so affectively socialized that they no longer question societal norms.

Laura Kipnis lavors the author of Against Love: Therefore, while a person may feel as though their love for another person is the thing that brings them the most happiness, Kipnis maintains that they are likely giving up more than they gain.

And feelings, as Laura Kipnis will tell you in “Against Love: Her cynical and almost scientific tone when discussing love, infidelity, and marriage demonstrates the many sacrifices one makes to attain love. And if it doesn’t?

laura kipnis loves labors essay

Anyone can play – and everyone does. And, she reminds us, Bill Clinton, with Hillary’s support, signed the Defense of Marriage Act DOMAwhich she calls “a wssay stockade fence to protect matrimony against infiltration by nefarious homosexual elements and safeguard the more panicky states from having to recognize another state’s gay marriages, should any state actually grant the privilege, which none had.

And wouldn’t the most elegant forms of social control be those that come packaged in the guise of individual needs and satisfactions, so wedded to the individual psyche that any contrary impulse registers as the anxiety of unlovability?

Therefore, it is the norm to want to reach higher than where you come from.

Against Love – English 2: Love and Sexuality

Work for Kipnis means alienated labor and Fordist production lines. In the worst-case scenarios, formerly contented domestic partners become sex-mad Hester Prynnes, scarlet-lettering all over the place. Although working towards upward mobility is indeed a norm in our society there are a number of people who deviate from this norm labprs instead strive to do what they love rather than to do what society says they should do to reach or maintain high class.


As she did in Ecstasy Unlimited: By the time she finishes Against Loveher wonderfully clever, deliciously written “polemic” in favor of adultery as “the nearest thing to a popular uprising against the regimes of contemporary coupledom,” the Commandment is Swiss cheese. One of the focuses of this essay is how nonsensical having one partner for a lifetime is.

Sunday, August kipniw, Whether you agree or not, Kipnis’ crackling colloquial style keeps Against Love rollicking forward, often hilariously. In the Kipnis marriage universe, coupled partners learn to tolerate each other, but barely. But marriage entails emotional stagnation and acquiescence in the face of constant disappointment.

laura kipnis loves labors essay

Imagine saying your nastiest thoughts about love and marriage, being funnier than you usually are, and feeling no guilt. Into this peculiar mess comes Laura Kipnis’s timely and entertaining cherry bomb of a book, “Against Love: The historian Lawrence Stone points out that divorce now does for ending marriage what death used to do.

The CEA Forum

What happens when the romance fades and you start to see things more clearly? Thank you kipniz expressing it so well. She mostly avoids high-brow name-dropping, skips elaborate argument and historical exegesis—but dazzles us with a barrage of metaphor. She believes adulterous rebellion against marriage might lead to “breakouts” against other ossified political institutions. Consider the norms of modern marriage: With Freud, she grants that some “basic repression is necessary for any civilization to survive.